Yeast Infections Help

In the brilliant box-office blockbuster I Am Legend, a terrifying plague wipes out most of humanity and Will Smith’s character is the sole survivor in New York. However if you suppose that sounds dramatic, I’m satisfied I will wake up one morning to find I’m the one particular person within the country nonetheless carrying spectacles. Every man and his dog would seem like getting laser eye surgical procedure (OK, maybe not the canines, however it’s solely a matter of time when you suppose what some bampot pet-house owners are like).

And the newspaper report I saw the other day - thank God for reading glasses - had my peepers bulging like Marty Feldman’s. Believe it or not, people, one hundred,000 people bored with carrying spectacles or contact lenses are now present process this corrective process within the UK every year. Nevertheless, although the advance in technology means there are fewer and fewer dangers, I’m afraid I nonetheless do not fancy it. Nope, I am going to persist with the Gregory Pecks, thanks very much.

I hate anyone or anything touching my eyes - especially a giant bloody laser - and I do not need to run the danger of getting smoking holes behind my head and shuffling about for the rest of my days like Donald Pleasance within the last half hour of The Nice Escape. Quite frankly, I might sooner have my meat and veg blowtorched by James Bond’s outdated flame Auric Goldfinger. I’m actually one of the fortunate ones. As you can see from the mugshot above, I need not worry a couple of pair of specs spoiling my beauty and I’ve worn glasses since… effectively, since Channel Four began exhibiting those Purple Triangle movies within the mid-Eighties.

And you recognize the one thing that bothers me in regards to the four-eyes look? This may sound daft, however I have a recurring nightmare about falling off a ship (a vacation cruise-liner, for example) and, regardless of being just 30 yards from the shore, I begin swimming in the wrong way because of the truth I’ve lost my glasses.

Cajoled by my optician at Dollond & Aitchison in Motherwell, I attempted contact lenses about 10 years ago - however I felt naked strolling up and down the precinct and rushed again to the shop for my specs. My mate received laser eye surgical procedure about 18 months ago and, although it was an ideal success and he now boasts 20/20 imaginative and prescient, he admits the video recording of his operation is certainly not for the squeamish.

I might challenge anyone to examine laser eye surgical procedure on Wikipedia while consuming their lunch. Except, of course, you discover having the highest layer of your cornea being scraped away or a flap lower in your eyeball notably appetising… Nope, it is undoubtedly not for yours truly and I can assure you I won’t be one of the one hundred,000 punters getting the therapy done in 2010.

My missus, however, is desperate for laser eye surgery… and I discover that even scarier. With 20/20 imaginative and prescient, I’m terrified she’ll take one have a look at the lump lying on the couch and head for the nearest divorce court. That’s on the playing cards, anyway, after our little change just the other night.

“I fancy getting that laser surgical procedure,” she said. “Good thought,” I replied. “You do not swimsuit a moustache…” ‘I do not need to run the danger of getting smoking holes behind my head and shuffling about for the rest of my days like Donald Pleasance in The Nice Escape’!